To My Friend and Toddler Mama,
I haven’t been able to stop thinking about our conversation in the car.
I wish that I could have found just the right words to say to make you feel better about this current stage of mamahood that you’re fighting through.
I hate that I don’t know what crappy book to recommend, the strategy that you should attempt next or how to
assure you that it will get better.
assure you that it will get better.
What I do know is that, no matter
what, your daughter knows that she is loved for all that she is, just as
she is.
what, your daughter knows that she is loved for all that she is, just as
she is.
For every time out, consequence and Mean Mom Eye she is shot,
she is hugged, praised and cherished twice over.
she is hugged, praised and cherished twice over.
She is wild, free and
stunningly intelligent – all of which combine to create a frustratingly
unique toddler creature – but she is also creative, independent and
fiercely herself. She can only be those things because you have
empowered her to be a confident mini version of a soon-to-be amazing woman. You are teaching her to be
kind with each tuck of her curls, strong with every moment of secretly
supervised independent play and self assured with the constant fuss you make over her Crayola artwork.
stunningly intelligent – all of which combine to create a frustratingly
unique toddler creature – but she is also creative, independent and
fiercely herself. She can only be those things because you have
empowered her to be a confident mini version of a soon-to-be amazing woman. You are teaching her to be
kind with each tuck of her curls, strong with every moment of secretly
supervised independent play and self assured with the constant fuss you make over her Crayola artwork.
One day she will aspire to mother her babe just
as you mothered her. She will sneak into the nursery and listen for the
soft breathing and desperately hope that she is making the
choices that you made so that her daughter will feel as cherished as she did
when she was snuggled safely in her toddler bed.
as you mothered her. She will sneak into the nursery and listen for the
soft breathing and desperately hope that she is making the
choices that you made so that her daughter will feel as cherished as she did
when she was snuggled safely in her toddler bed.
Truthfully, none of us are truly
winning at this mom thing, we’re all just doing the best we can with
what we have. When you lay in bed tonight and grade your Mommy Report
Card, grade yourself as I would grade you. Look at yourself through her
eyes. Give yourself a little bit of grace and an ass load of compassion.
Remember that you chose kind words (even if they were said through
gritted teeth), hid in your bathroom to cry tears of frustration instead
of taking it out on her and, at the very least, survived another day in
the Toddler Trenches.
winning at this mom thing, we’re all just doing the best we can with
what we have. When you lay in bed tonight and grade your Mommy Report
Card, grade yourself as I would grade you. Look at yourself through her
eyes. Give yourself a little bit of grace and an ass load of compassion.
Remember that you chose kind words (even if they were said through
gritted teeth), hid in your bathroom to cry tears of frustration instead
of taking it out on her and, at the very least, survived another day in
the Toddler Trenches.
While I may not always know just the right thing to say,
I am always here when you need me.
I am always here when you need me.
Love,
Me.
photo by Danielle Brady Photography
I love this. You're right, none of is are truly winning, merely surviving at times, getting through day by day, navigating out way through the trenches if toddlerhood!! Good work, mama!!!! XO
This is such a beautiful post, I seriously felt as though you were speaking to me 🙂 thank you so much!! xo
I link to five of my favourite posts I've read over the week every friday and I am going to include this one
What a beautiful friend you are, Steph! And what a sweet, sweet letter! I needed to hear this today, too. 🙂 Thanks!
Friends – thank goodness for those that we can pick and make family. Everyday we question everything we are doing, but one hug, one caress of the cheek and you think "Today, today I did pretty okay" Love you ladies!! xoxo
aww this is so sweet! you're a great friend.
This is so thoughtful. You are an incredible friend. <3 Although, I am not a mother yet. It warms my heart to hear this sweet encouragement. <3
http://www.sanchezfamilyoftwo.blogspot.com
That was the perfect thing to say. I love this!
Beautifully written! My girls are no longer toddlers, I have beaten myself up over my parenting every step of the way – I think it comes with the territory! But to have lovely, warm supportive fellow mums around you, I believe makes all the difference. You are a fantastic friend to take the time to write this when you have your own trials at the moment. You are a girl who has her priorities in the right order! Bless you both xxx
Beautiful- what a wonderful reminder to us all to be the biggest cheerleaders for others 🙂
Such pretty words! You are a sweet friend, for sure!
We are our own worst critics when it comes to Mom-ing and it's especially hard when you get backlash from other moms but this post is just lovely and you're a great friend!
This is so beautiful. She's lucky to have you as a friend. I agree, none of us are winning at this mom thing. I wish we could all empower each other as you have her. Thanks for sharing this with all of us.